I’ll walk you through my weekly update for May 1st and where I am right now.
So, I was supposed to start meditating every day for 5 minutes. Did I do that? The short answer: No.
AAAAHHHHH!!!!
Learning Experiences
I reeaaallly wanted to use the heading “mistakes” instead of “learning experiences,” but I am attempting to change the way I look at this. The word “mistake” to me sounds so negative and leads to those pesky negative intrusive thoughts I fight so hard against daily. So, to counteract those happiness killers, I’m going to call this a learning experience.
No Reminders
I have to sort of kick myself (constructively) for this one. After writing the post of ignoring reminders, I did not even set one. NOT ONE! I’m sure I’m not the only one who has fallen into this trap. My brain says “Oh, I’ll remember” and then a week goes by without any remembering going on.
This week, I set not just one, but TWO whole fantastic reminders for me to ignore (hopefully not). I set a reminder through the Insight Timer app for 8 pm. The evening is usually better for me so I picked a time after dinner when I am usually just relaxing. Then, I set an alarm on my phone for 8:10. My theory is that I can ignore one, but if I ignore both then I’ll set myself down the path of self-deprecation and I try very hard to avoid that.
No Meditation Space
Not only did I not set any reminders, but I did not make it easy on myself to want to meditate. Sure, my apartment is cozy, but it’s cozy for watching TV or playing video games. I did not have a space that was designed to make me WANT to meditate.
Much to my husband’s chagrin, I set up my yoga mat in our bedroom today. Just laying it out made me feel better about my meditation space. I also set up my essential oil diffuser with some lavender oil. It’s all ready to go for meditation time.
I don’t know a lot about essential oils and can’t speak to their legitimacy, but hey I like the smell, and mine has some nice mood lighting. Welcome to possible placebo land. Hopefully creating a space just for meditation will make me ready to go when my reminders start yelling. Although this is really where I want to be meditating, I’ll settle for my apartment.
Photo by Johannes Plenio
Goals for this week
Take two on meditation…I will meditate for 5 minutes a day. While I was initially disappointed with myself for not keeping my goal, a pat on the back is deserved for making a plan to fix it instead of wallowing in the “mistakes” I made. That’s mainly the reason for my weekly update for May 1st anyway. I want to hold myself accountable while finding ways to accept myself. The journey is annoyingly difficult, but I will continue to find my way.